Thank God For Giggles
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My best friend is near death.
I wrote this for you and for all of us. I’ve explained why below.
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The small meeting room was packed tight. I was giving a seminar and was in the middle of something fairly serious when the door opened.
In walked this radiant blond woman. She paused, as she realized she was the focus of our attention. The door was to the front, so she suddenly found herself facing a whole room full of people, all staring back at her.
Her date was saving the only seat, which was on the other side of the room. She had no choice but to come between me and the audience, excusing herself as she went. She also had a nervous giggle, which was infectious and continual as she squeezed through the tight quarters.
Of course, I welcomed her and paused until she was seated. The audience’s entire attention was still focused on her, which clearly embarrassed her, and which caused her to giggle even more.
Her date was peeved and was obviously asking her to settle down. By that time all of us, except for him, were smiling too. All I had to do was look in her direction and the giggles would start again. She giggled a lot that night.
Because of that seminar and her giggles, Shirley and I met and later started dating. She was a single mom to three kids, who were just extraordinary. I fell in love with the whole family.
Later she and I realized that we that while we should be dating we should not dating with each other. It was hard.
We went our separate ways for about six months, but then we became friends. Then we became best friends, which we’ve been for over 30 years now.
Not only has Shirley been my best friend, she’s been my mentor, coach, confidant, and as close as any member of my blood family. I love her children as my own.
I heard a definition of a friend once, which is someone who knows everything about you but likes you anyway. That’s us.
She became a highly respected Buddhist meditation teacher. Before that she was in sales and marketing and was always the number one sales leader. How she did that with three kids and chronic pain, which she’s suffered with for years, is a tribute to her spirit.
She was diagnosed with cancer over a year ago. It was slow moving and we all knew that she had such power that no cancer would dare move fast. But then suddenly, it did. We just got word a few weeks ago that it has metastasized on her liver. She’s been hospitalized but then chose to go home under hospice care.
She’s helped many people with her teachings and her friendship. She is loved by people all over the world, some of whom only had a few minutes with her personally at retreats and meetings. The phones haven’t stopped ringing.
She’s always touched people. She’s automatically shown interest and compassion towards others. When she walked through a mall, all she would have to do would be to look at a child with her big blue eyes and the child would immediately reach out to her.
I saw it over and over again. Within moments she’d have even the smallest baby giggling, which was mirrored with her own infectious giggle. Pretty soon everyone within earshot would be giggling too.
We talked on the phone yesterday and even in her weakened state, we had fun reminiscing about our first meeting. If she hadn’t been late, if she hadn’t giggled, if I hadn’t been so charmed by her, we’d have never met. I would have missed these years and the love of her extraordinary family and friends.
For as long as I can recall we never ended a phone call or parted without saying, “I love you.”
She is at peace with her situation, though her pain is hard to control, her meditation practice helps. She feels no fear of death, but leaving family and friends is the hardest. Hard for us all.
As I made my reservations to visit her this last time, I’ve been sitting back and thinking about our conversation yesterday and all those wonderful and even tough times we’ve shared together.
What a blessing.
I’m sharing this with you because I want to encourage you, as an old friend of mine once did for me, that you should never hesitate to tell those you love that you love them.
Make it a point. Do it today. Express your gratitude and your love, even if it feels a bit embarrassing. Encourage them to do the same.
Thank God for giggles.
Thank God for Shirley.
http://yourinnerwizard.com/update-thank-god-for-giggles/
Tom
Thank you for sharing your heart.
Massive blessings and comfort on both of you…and thank God for Giggles…
~ Jeff
Thank you for sharing this, Tom. This is encouraging. Just some days ago I did express my love and appreciation to someone, with a very special gift, where I had to release fear and embarassment to be able to do that. I had been guided to that point with something my Spirit guide taught me: “It is never love that hurts. That which hurts are the blockages that humans place to avoid expressing love due to fear, because of beliefs it wouldn’t be adequate in the illusionary personal movie called reality. But truth is, we are all beings of love and to express love is our true nature. So, blocking true nature – that is which causes pain.”
What you share is synchronicity and a confirmation.
The choice is always to trust and follow love, even if it calls up fear – lberating our true nature is in chosing love above fear.
Blessings for you and for Shirley.
Sabine
What a lovely, touching story. Even though the ending is sad, knowing that Shirley is at peace and has no fear of death, is comforting.
The message about letting go of blockages and embarassment in order to express love is powerful. I unfortunately am one of those people who are embarassed to display affection and express love even to the closest of family members. However this story you shared and the message it carries has made me decide to do everything in my power to overcome the blockages. Thank you.
Very touching, Tom. I celebrate that kind of friendship you shared. And hope to emulate it.
Thank you all for your support and kind words.
Tom
Hi Tom,
Another great post to your blog. I appreciate you sharing such a touching story. Your meeting Shirley was meant to be. It reminds me of when and how I met my wonderful Wife. Life is not an accident, these things happen for a reason. It’s up to us to capture them and you did just that. Even though Shirley touched your life in a very positive way, I’m sure you did the same for her.
G-d bless,
Kevin
What a wonderful post. A good reason to appreciate every moment life gives us. Shirley sounds a fantastic lady who has touched many peoples lives, and now even more through your post.
God bless you, Shirley and all her family and friends.
What a moving post. My mom left us just over a year ago and went as she’d wanted – in her own bed and asleep. Even before that I’d ended phone and other meetings with friends and family by saying “I love you”.
I could hardly my ears, though, hen a friend from my California days ended his call by saying “I love you”! It both surprised and meant a lot to me.
In 2005, I had a stroke which left me talking “funny”, and with poor balance (I use a walker) but I’ve not let this stop me. I believe that it’s because of my “never let anything stop you attitude” that I had before that I got through it the way I do.
Experience EVERY day in the “now” and end EVERY conversation with “I love you” and mean it.
I am so touched by the warmth and sincerity and the power of the love and friendship you have shared. I will be sharing your post with my list to encurage them to remember to show their love. I say “I love you to all of my friends when we part and sometimes just because …” There are no more beautiful words. They have such healing power!
Tom, This was so very touching; thank you for sharing it. It is very special to have such a close friend who knows the real you – someone with whom you can truly be yourself. I’m glad you have had that. I, too have such a friend and treasure the relationship. Love to both of you.
What a blessing you are to those of us who are lucky enough to have made your acquaintance, either on line or in person. You are a joy to “talk” with and you have brightened my day with your inspirational story about your friendship. Thank you for sharing a very personal “love story” about someone you obviously care very deeply for. We could all learn from your expressiveness and my prayer is that you find peace with her illness and that she finds the peace she is looking for in leaving you and her other loved ones behind. Love to you for being a special friend to her all these years…